Do the Yak

Full disclosure: I started this post back in February and forgot about it until trolling my "draft" list. So... old news, but related to the Elliot Spitzer scandal, see this hilarious " script " by Greg Howard, a.k.a. Geese Aplenty, on legalizing prostitution. Also, the American Film Institute issued (quite a while ago now) its annual list of the Top 100 Movies of All Time, as determined by an AFI jury of 1,500 film artists, critics and historians. Here's the original press release in PDF. I reprint the list here with color coding. Warning: if you're reading this, you are morally and legally obligarted to comment on this post with your reactions and opinions, citing your own movie viewing history as well as at least three academic sources. OK, none is fine as well. Green = Movies I've see and really love — I totally agree with the AFI on these. Black = Movies I've seen but that wouldn't make my personal top-100 list. Red = Movies I haven't...

“Poseidon”… Just as I expected, terrific special effects (especially the inversion!) but character development and dialogue were sorely lacking. This version could have used memorable lines like “Mrs. Peter Pan, I’m not” or “ I saw a young officer on deck the other day, and he looked pretty damn familiar -- even with his clothes on!" or the immortal “Life always matters… very much… doesn't it? ERKH!” [head lolls back lifelessly]. We miss you, Shelley. Anyway, rather than bore everyone with yards of prose, I think a simple table should do the trick: “The Poseidon Adventure” (1972) “Poseidon” (2006) Fading stars Pretty much the whole cast except maybe Gene Hackman and the kid Kurt Russell, Richard Dreyfuss Inversion Lame – a model in a bathtub Excellent, thanks to the several thousand people credited with some sort of CGI work Cheesy song “ There’s Got t...

Ben and I saw " Poseidon " on Wednesday. To absolutely no one's surprise, I have lots of Deep Thoughts about the remake as well as comparisons to the original ("that's heavy, Robin"). I know it's retarded, but I took a pass on the scifi-fantasy Hobbit / Dungeons and Dragons nerdliness earlier in life, and I'm not a computer programmer, so I have the right to geek out about SOMETHING. Too bad I don't put this much effort into something else, like say learning an instrument, in which case I'd be appearing nightly at Carnegie Hall or at least Great Woods. But this is gonna take a while, so brace yourself for a future sea o' type. Elsewhere in the news, work has turned into a deluge as I crank out actual web pages, among other side projects that have suddenly cropped up. This three-day weekend will be a wonderful thing. And no 9:15 a.m. soccer tomorrow -- woo hoo! Ben personally accompanied the surveyor and held the sticks this morning at our...

First of all, I recently noticed that the links in my April 29 post didn't go through from Microsoft Word for some reason (what a piece of shit that program is -- don't get me started), so have another look. The mots important thing, of course, is "The Amazing Mackerel Pudding Plan." The girls are now in Level 2 swimming lessons. Sarah is older and has always loved the water, so she's having a swell time. Becky is more buoyant but a bit younger and more insecure, so she isn't willing to let me get more than a few feet away from her and the rest of the class in the pool. But that's OK because she still loves the water and I get to see her cute chubby thighs in the water, which I have to remember may someday resemble those of the submerged Shelley Winters in "The Poseidon Adventure," and good lord but I totally have to see the remake that just came out, even though the characters and dialogue will undoubtedly have way too little over-the-top hammi...

In the last few days I've discovered two things to get excited about. These are things I don't expect anyone else would be dorky enough to get excited about, but we're all unique and special, yada yada yada. The first thing is that I just learned the extremely useful verb "to zerbit," which is what Ben does to the kids to cause tremendous, delightful fits of giggles. He's much better at it than I am -- he has some way of easily accessing the tender, juicy area around the belly button. That makes two words so far this month for this word nerd to delight in (the other was smurgling ). The second exciting discovery is the trailer and approximate release date for the remake of "The Poseidon Adventure." I make no secret of the fact that the original 1972 version is my favorite movie of all time. I had heard rumors of a remake because I actually visited a couple of Poseidon Adventure fan site a while ago, including this one and this one . I'm mostly ...

I guess this blogging thing has started to affect my brain, because I’ve jumped another blogger bandwagon. What the hell, like I tell myself about the rest of this drivel, at least my kids will have something to know me by, assuming the North Koreans don’t nuke the Internet. My herbs and spices are in alphabetical order. I cut the ends off bay leaves so they’ll fit in my jars. I love starch, dairy foods and melted cheese (not raw). Fettuccine alfredo is almost ideal. My favorite food in the universe is Pizzeria Uno deep-dish cheese and tomato pizza. I can’t stand stupid people who don’t care that they’re stupid. I converted to Judaism in 1998 even though I’m an atheist (my rabbi said it was OK). I love Macs and deplore Windows. I especially enjoy desktop publishing. I am a huge Boston Red Sox fan. I’ve watched the Oscars every year since about 1978. One year I had to watch it in my father’s car on a little TV that ran off the cigarette lighter because our power was out. When I was 10,...

The news and video about Hurricane Katrina are unbelievable. One story said this is the most significant event in recent U.S. memory aside from 9/11, and I don't think that's an exaggeration. The destruction sounds comparable in some ways to Hiroshima, though of course without the radiation, thankfully. Hearing about Katrina makes we wonder how I would react and what steps I would take if I were in that situation. Suppose I were stuck on a New Orleans rooftop with Sarah and Becky and Ben, or even on a piece of dry land? What could I do to get everyone to safety? How far could we carry the children? How would we find food and water? How long would we have to walk? Could we find a boat or a wagon to help us? And what would happen if we encountered looters or robbers? Could I myself steal things or commit an act of violence if I needed food or water or clothing? Probably. It's fascinating to speculate on how individuals and society would cope with a disaster and the sudden, to...